Upgrade: Becoming a Homeowner
When I was a little girl, I remember thinking that you became a “real adult” when you became a homeowner. Why? Homeownership said so much about someone: they have a career that pays them enough to buy a house which probably means they also have a college degree, and they likely have a family or at least intend to have one since they don’t need all that space for just one person. The degree, the job, the house, the family were all characteristics of a “real adult” to me. It was obviously a rude awakening when I got older and discovered just how difficult it is to obtain all of those things, especially if you don’t have help. So I let go of the expectation and just hoped that we would be able to buy a house sometime in our lifetime. Besides, there’s no such thing as a “real” adult and having those things didn’t make you an adult! Soon after coming to terms with this realization though, a little curiosity and courage led us to becoming homeowners almost immediately.
How We Got Here
After getting engaged, J and I set various goals- one of which was to get educated on homeownership and the housing market so that we could start saving and preparing as much as we could. We read a ton of articles that all said the same thing: it was a “bad time to buy”, young people will never be able to afford houses, don’t even bother trying, etc. We decided we might learn better with a hands-on approach. In October, we got in touch with a real estate agent and let her know upfront that we wanted to learn but that we may not ever be able to buy, and she was open to the challenge. We went in absolutely blind but she never pressured us and only ever focused on making sure we understood something before we moved on. I’m so glad we went this route with hands-on learning because if we hadn’t we probably would have waited until our 40s to even start, just because we assumed it wasn’t possible for us. If I could give one piece of advice to anyone who is not yet a homeowner but wants to be, it would be this: just start, and ask more questions than you think you should- even if you think they’re dumb or that you should already know the answer or that you’re bugging your agent. Don’t let insecurity prevent you from getting what you want, whether that’s knowledge, respect, or a house lol.
Finances
Vulnerability time! To be transparent, I want to give you an overview of what we were working with going into this: One, we had a savings but it was also our wedding budget. Two, I did not have good credit, was barely making minimum payments and was well into 5 figures of debt, but J was in good standing. Three, J had a good-paying full time job that he had been at for years, and I was making $14/hour, had over 5 different jobs in the last 3 years (one of which was under the table and made it look like I had been unemployed for a year), and was about to jump ship to another job in the hopes of better pay. Four, I was enrolled in college with at least two more years to go which was a huge expense. To say I felt like a huge burden is an understatement, and what made it worse is that I refused to accept help (we’ll talk about that another time). But who knew you could succeed with all this baggage, am I right?!
J and I agreed that if we found a house that checked all the boxes, we would forgo the wedding of our dreams so that we could have a chance at establishing ourselves in a city we loved. Buying our home took a lot of compromise. Another thing I want you to keep in mind is that not everything you hear and read is true. It was engraved in my brain that we needed at least 10-20% for a down payment before we even start looking. While that would be nice, it’s not realistic in today’s economy. And we certainly did not have 10-20%, even with our savings. We were excited to find out that a good lender will find the best options for you based on where you are in the moment. In order for this to work, you must be totally transparent about your finances, and money is a particularly sore subject for me so I found working with the lender to be the hardest part. We had to jump through 5 or 6 different hoops to get to our best option, but it was so worth it in the end.
To Back Out or Not to Back Out…
Another thing we weren’t expecting was that you can jump ship at any time if things don’t feel right. Our lender always made sure we knew that no matter how far in we went that we could always call it off and she would advocate for us so we didn’t have to do the dirty work. We always assumed once you started this process you had to follow through or else you wasted everyone’s time. And while that’s a little true, it’s also not your job to make sure others are happy, especially when it’s your money, your home and your future on the line. Having the option to back out took off loads of pressure and made the whole experience much more enjoyable.
What I Love About Being a Homeowner
I can’t put into words how grateful I am to have a home with our names on it. I’m so lucky that we had a team of people around that genuinely wanted the best for us. I wanted to end this post on a positive note and share some of the things I’ve found to love about being a homeowner- some of which surprised me!
Cleaning: I used to hate cleaning but I take so much pride in my space now because it’s mine and I own it!
Home improvements: I am constantly seeking out ways I can improve my home. I thought that these would feel like tasks but honestly it feels like a hobby. One of my favorite things to do is look at my list of things I want to work on and budget and plan the next project. And it feel so good to cross something off that list!
The feeling of permanence: Leasing apartments was so hard on me mentally, especially in Austin. In all the time I’ve lived here, I’ve never had the opportunity to resign a lease because the cost of rent increased every year and pay never did. Now that I have a home, I don’t have to constantly anticipate moving and I can actually relax into my space!
Being able to decorate, and decorate however I want: I never decorated any of my previous apartments because I knew we would be out of there in a year. It felt silly to spend money to make a space feel cohesive when everything could change when the lease was up.
Getting to know my neighbors: I had never met anyone who lived near me when I was in an apartment. I really appreciate that I get to know the people I live by now- it makes me feel safer!
Having a backyard: It’s become a new ritual of mine to have coffee and eat outside whenever I can. I love that I can sit on my back porch and watch my cat and dog play in the yard!
Being able to host guests: I absolutely love hosting. I love that we have more than enough room for people to park their car outside, sleep comfortably in our guest bedrooms, eat meals with us, and just enjoy our space as much as we do. Hosting in an apartment was usually so difficult because we lacked hangout space, parking, and rarely did we have room for anyone to stay overnight. The thought of hosting our first holiday in our home gives me butterflies!
Pride in owning it: There’s a really special feeling in knowing something is yours and that you worked hard to get it. Like earning your degree, or finally paying off your car, or buying that luxury purse you saved for 2 years to get. Although we do have a mortgage, making our payments doesn’t hurt the same as paying rent because we benefit from it in a different way!
Seeing my home through the seasons: I love that our house has a different vibe depending on the time of year. Spring and Summer at our house was gorgeous and I can’t wait to see the warmth of Fall come through. J really wants to put up Christmas lights this year and I’m already anticipating the joy from pulling up in our driveway at night with our son and seeing the glow of our house!
